The magical mystery tour of moving
Every box you unpack is an adventure, an exploration of a past life. See that box in the foreground of the photo marked “Tracy’s com?” I’m afraid of that box. Who knows what’s in it? That’s my handwriting, so I packed it, but I have no idea what’s in there, so instead of unpacking it, I moved it out of the way, putting it off until tomorrow. But that revealed the box below it, completely unmarked, even more terrifying. I fled, going downstairs to unpack the boxes marked “pantry.” They had to be safe, right?
No so fast, buddy. I found a plastic container of honey that had solidified into something so hard, it could be used as a weapon. And that’s not all. There was a can of tomatoes in there so old, it had ruptured and leaked a black gooey substance all over the spine of an old Mark Bittman “How to Cook Everything” cookbook that had resided next to it on a shelf for at least a decade.
See what I mean? Every time you move, you learn things about yourself that were best left forgotten on a shelf somewhere, safe from the prying eyes of time. But we’re here now, not there, and who knows what the future holds? Only the boxes know.
The column, and sanity, returns tomorrow…if I make it.
Perfect! This is exactly what my wife and I went through and felt like during our move-in last summer. Opening up boxes, wondering what exactly was inside, and when you'd find the things you most need or want. Instead of those supplies or stereo components or parts of disassembled furniture you were hoping to find, there would be a box of vintage Batman trading cards, a ceramic bear, a package of soap. Mary said, "It's like Christmas in Hell."
LOL. Okay, maybe you don't make it look so easy after all. it's still the same mix of horrors I always find. DON'T THROW AWAY THE HONEY. You can heat it and it goes back to uncrystallized honey. Honey can last thousands of years and not go bad. Who knows why and who knows who tasted thousands of years old honey for us?