"We are not eating Korean in the Poconos."

Notes from a peep that didn't leaf

The nightmare corridor in the Kalahari hotel/casino/water park/arcade/spa

The plan, to the extent we had cobbled one together, was to go leaf-peeping in the Poconos on a gorgeous Sunday afternoon.  Of course, we live in the Poconos, or in the furthest northeast corner of them anyway, the Delaware River flowing only a block from our house.  New Jersey is just across the river, and New York State begins taxing people six miles down the road in Port Jervis. But here we are, planted in the village that serves as a de facto gateway to the Pocono Mountains, with the first of them, called by the locals “The Knob,” visible from our bedroom window.

The leaves have already turned here, reaching their peak a week or so ago, so we figured we would hop in the car and drive further south where an internet leaf-peeping map showed the colors to be richer, and the barren branches fewer.

Thinking we could just hop in the car and go was our first mistake.  No sooner had we groaned into the bucket seats of my 2006 KIA Spectra 5 and cranked up the engine and put it in reverse and eased back on the clutch, there was a loud pop from somewhere beneath the front of the car.  I figured, hell, a car with 201,000 miles on it is going to pop occasionally, so we drove down the driveway and started toward the main street through town.  Maybe a block past the stoplight, the steering wheel began shimmying in my hands, and me?  The genius car guy who wrenched hot rods back in the day and once went so far as to buy a Porsche, I figured, well, a car with 201,000 miles on it is bound to shimmy a little, so we continued out of town and got on the highway south. 

And then things got worse. The shimmy turned bone-rattling with a vibration so loud we couldn’t hear each other. I figured a steering arm bushing had lost its ability to bush. We were in serious trouble, so we turned around and headed back to get into Tracy’s 1999 Suzuki Vitara that would be much more reliable with only 160,000 miles on it. After exchanging cars and a certain amount of grumbling from yours truly, we were off once more.